I Am Not Tony. Or Guy

High Contrast — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 22:56:08 +0000

I was going to cancel the landline in my studio, don’t really use it much myself. But I just can’t let it go because of the quality of the answerphone messages I get. It must be a very special number. One that must be so delightful, people go to ring their brother Dave for a drink or try to win back their favourite cleaning lady (?) but they end up calling my number instead. It just feels right to them. And then they keep ringing back, getting more and more angry that I haven’t called them to arrange a drink or to chase up their hair appointment.

Here’s a prime example…

Love that woman’s voice. You can hear the pain of the world pressing down on it. So much so she doesn’t even know her own number. And then when I don’t get back to her, she get’s all shitty. But leaves a polite ‘bye’ at the end. She eventually called at a reasonable hour and I put her out of her misery. ‘It’s not actually a hairdressers conspiracy. Tony & Guy aren’t snubbing you cos you’re too old.’

More wrong numberers soon…

Highly Contrasting » Hal 9000

I Am Not Tony. Or Guy